I have a pet goat!

I am addicted to Radio London and Danny Baker in particular. His phone in of the week is your top 5 of anything you like - M25 junctions, granny's names to list just two. I hate to be left out so I thought up my own list. It was going to be things that Bella has eaten. I started my list -an entire frozen pizza including the wrapper and foam base, a box of eggs (literally), my dinner left unattended on the kitchen table but I realised the list was going to be way too long. I had a brainwave I would narrow it down to non-food items that she has consumed.

So here is the list.

5) various headphone buds.
4) an inflated balloon.
3) the DVD of Inception.
2) my friends pants
1) two Blackberry phones.

I was on the afternoon's show today (12th Jan) just after 3.30pm if any of you actually want to hear the whole thing. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p001d7kl

One of my friends who heard it texted me and said "you haven't got a dog - she must actually be a pet goat."

I think she may well be right. While on the phone to the bank just now attempting to have a sensible grown up conversation I find her with the remnants of a wire wool scourer hanging out of her mouth.

A whole year has passed...........or have you ever seen a Labrador with chewing gum!?

Today is the anniversary of the day we bought Bella home. I was going to write some meaningful blog about the joys of having a dog. It was going to bring tears to your eyes. Bella has other ideas. I just caught her sneaking up the stairs. She bypassed the cats, the cat food, the cat litter and straight into moody teenagers room. He is out. I get her down the stairs to find she is eating something - she is chewing and chewing and chewing and chewing. I prise open her jaws - it looks like Blu Tack but smells of peppermint. Yes it is chewing gum! Its another first on the list of things she has eaten and I'm fairly sure it was wrapper and all!

Back to the anniversary. It some ways it seems to have flown by, and it other ways it feel like she has been a part of our lives forever. I can't remember what life was like without her. She is always pleased to see you, she is always in a good mood. She loves every meal that is put in front of her. She loves any meal that is NOT put in front of her! You never quite know what is going to happen next. I wouldn't be without her for the world, and I don't regret for one second getting her.

Here's to the second anniversary!

Just in case you were worried!

Labradors are well known for eating a wide variety of objects, and sometimes they cause problems when they get stuck. I was beginning to get worried about the absence of the sock that she ate on Sunday. I have been watching closely for signs of ill health - but there were none, and I am very pleased to report that it finally appeared today. I looked carefully to check I wasn't mistaken and was very surprised to find out it was a pair of ladies pants instead of a sock! Just waiting for the earphone bud to pop out now!

There's been a lot going on in my life............

I had thought I had given up this blog but Bella still gets up to so many antics that I have decided to resurrect it after yesterdays antics.

I was visiting a friend in Marlow and we went for a dog walk along the Thames tow path. It was very exciting for Bella who is not used to so many new things... lots of people, picnics, ducks, swans, cyclists,water..... the list goes on. Ah yes water! Labradors love water so it as no surpise when she jumped in, did a little dogggy paddle and jumped out shortly afterwards. It was so much fun she did it again.....and then once more. The only problem the third time was she jumped in just near a group of children canoeing. She hadn't seen this before and so she was off after them - a big yellow submarine! The Thames is quite wide you know but that didn't deter her! She was oblivious to our calls but just when I was thinking I was going to have to jump in after her, back she came. She must have swum the equivalent of a width of the Thames and best of all no one capsized! Of course as soon as she got out she shook the water all over me!

Her eating habits remain diverse and varied. Letters, cardboard, balloons (inflated) and last night her piece de resistance a whole sock. I am now on sock watch as I am rather worried that its not going to come out the other end. Its been 24 hours now but she seems to be fine. The good news is that it should be early easy to spot! The headphone earpiece may be slightly harder to detect!

Its been a while.........

Sorry not have blogged for so long. I was a little busy with the small matter of riding to Paris on my bike! It was a fantastic experience by the way, and I would highly recommend it to anyone.

Anyway back to Bella. Well what can I say about the one dog danger machine!? Life carries on with an almost daily dose of trouble of one kind or another. I frequently find her in the garden devouring something from the house, more often than, not a stolen item. If I catch her before she has eaten it she usually throws me a surprised look as if to say "how could you possibly think it was me?!", followed by "we usually keep the Cherios under the tree in the garden don't we?" or "of course my food lives in my basket"!

She was spayed last Tuesday so I was expecting a quiet week. How wrong could I be? Firstly 3 days
post-op she devours a box of chocolates. We were due at the vets for a check up, and the vet and the nurse both agreed that she should stay in and be made to be sick. She came home still loving the vet surgery and none the worse for wear.

Yesterday I left her unattended and she ate some plaque disclosing tablets. You know, the ones that dentists give you to show where the plaque is on your teeth. I am pleased to report that her teeth remained very white so no plaque there then, and her tongue was a lovely shade of purple! I tried to take a photo but it was impossible especially as I kept on laughing!

Later we went to the park. She is supposed to be having a quiet time so she had to stay on the lead. Anyway between us we managed to entertain the whole park when she managed to get away from me and tried to join in 2 different games of football, with her lead trailing behind and me in hot pursuit! Both the footballs miraculously survived their encounter with Bella.

In case you are wondering we are still going to training classes. Our trainer announced last week that we are going to do a series of tests. If we get 7 passes we get a rosette, and if we can do all 40 things we get a silver engraved cup. She has only ever given 3 away and she has been doing it for years. I think it is safe to say we are not going to receive the 4th.

Dog walking

One of the reasons that I wanted a dog is because it forces you to go out and walk. I hadn't realised what a social experience it was going to be. Nearly every walk you go on you end up talking to someone.

Today we went to One Tree Hill for the first time. I have been there before we got Bella but it was her first time there. It is very hilly and I am slow both up and down hills so Bella had to keep coming back to find me. The bluebells are out and the sun was shining and it was so beautiful.

Of course with Bella there had to be some sort of incident. As I was struggling up a particularly steep path, and Bella was ahead we came across an elderly couple sitting on a bench having their picnic lunch. They didn't hear her approach and quicker than a flash she stole one of their sandwiches. They were very nice about it but I was feeling guilty about it as we walked on.

I decided to take a different path home - big mistake. On and on we went, down a footpath, down a bridleway, crossing a road I didn't recognise until we finally reached a pub that I know. The only trouble was I didn't have any money and it was miles from where we needed to be! No other option than to retrace our footsteps. I normally only walk her for an absolute maximum of one hour, but it was almost two hours later when we made it back to the car.

Just before we got back to the car we came across an elderly couple - guess who!? They felt so sorry for the dog having walked so far they gave her the rest of their sandwiches! And for me? There was nothing left!

Marletta

I thing we are going to rechristen her Marletta as she is desperately trying to recreate the character from the book!

Have just come downstairs into the kitchen and caught her RED - PAWED with her feet up firmly on the kitchen table! She tried very hard to appear totally innocent, as if it was something we would normally let her do. It's not by the way! She then decided her next move was to be really cute instead - so she rolled on her back and with the expression "love me love me love me". The words twisted round little finger spring to mind.

My son has just told me the story of yesterday. I was out for the day and my brother was in charge of the house. He decided to make a cooked breakfast. My son got the eggs out of the fridge. "Where are the eggs? They were here a minute ago" my brother said "They cant just have vanished!"

The culprit was discovered in the garden with a whole box of eggs, one in her mouth. Her first line of defence was "I'm allowed to do this - right?" Her next line of defence was to destroy the evidence - the raw egg was eaten shell and all. Somehow 5 eggs were rescued intact.

We were out today and I decided to show one of her young admirers a trick that she does. Treat in hand I said "Paw". She sat and stared as if she had no idea what I was talking about. I waved the treat under her nose and tried again. Still no game, and the toddler gave me a look of disdain. Shown up by my own dog!